leaning into full acceptance

how much energy do you spend trying to change what is? what if you accepted what is, in this very moment, no matter how messy or uncomfortable the moment is? go ahead, try it… 

ask yourself, what is present in this moment? what feeling/feelings? what worries? what judgements? what thoughts? what can you identify? go with whatever is most present and at the forefront of your experience. 

now, i invite you to fully accept what is here, allowing it to just be. 

when you lean into full acceptance, do you feel an energy shift? do you feel relief? do you feel lighter, even when what is present may be heavy? if what is present is light… peace, joy, satisfaction, hope… can you be with it without fear of it leaving? (this can be incredibly challenging for me)

listen, if you are a bit resistant to this whole acceptance thing, hopefully a little reminder about what acceptance put into practice looks like will help you find some ease and curiosity around it… 

acceptance is the willingness to allow what is to BE… even if only for a few moments.

i know, one of my biggest fears about acceptance has been, that if i accept what is present, i may get stuck in the emotion or situation forever and never make my way out. or, as i said above, on the flip side, i’ve been afraid to acknowledge the good stuff for fear that i will lose it as soon as i touch it. as i’ve begun to play with accepting what is, i have found that neither are true.  so, trust me when i say, by going into acceptance, even for a few moments, you may be surprised what you’ll find… i was. 

so much of our energy gets expended fighting what is, and if we’re not fighting it, we’re trying to distract ourselves from it. however, through acceptance, the energy we spend pushing against what is or that’s wrapped up in our habits and addictions, has the opportunity to be returned to us. 

now, let’s take this one step further… in this moment, i invite you to notice and accept what is present without resisting or judging. alright, stay with me when i say this, especially if what is present is uncomfortable… can you even BASK in what is showing up for you? the depression, the excitement, the anxiety, the hope, the grief, the weightlessness, the apathy, the exhaustion, the joy… 

whatever is here, can you fully immerse yourself? in my most “southern” term… can you allow yourself to “wallow” in it?

as i’ve been experimenting with this practice, what i have found, is that, when i am fully present and basking/wallowing/ fully immersed in whatever emotional experience is present, right along side that emotion is a deep sense of peace. right there with exhaustion, apathy and grief this morning was peace and dare i say, joy. 

joy emerged out of acceptance and surrender to what was. 

so, there i was, holding exhaustion, apathy, grief, joy and peace, all in one breath. in that moment, i felt such profound relief in knowing myself to a greater depth, being present and curious in the moment and allowing what was there to just be as it was. i stayed fully immersed in the emotional experience that was making itself known for a couple of minutes and then, let the practice go. 

i say practice because i have begun to make this experience of acceptance a daily ritual. when i feel myself straining or pushing to make something happen or trying to change my emotional landscape, i simply stop and ask myself, “what is present” and “can i accept what is here?” i stay curious with my experience for a couple of minutes and then, check in to see if a little more spaciousness is accessible. sometimes, i feel vast and light. other times, there is a little more peace and spaciousness and yet, a heaviness or anxiousness still remains… but somehow, i’m able to hold the discomfort with a little more ease and grace.

after several days of incorporating this ritual into my daily routine, i have even begun to stop and ask myself “what is present” when i am feeling all the good vibes and get to know and magnify those. in these moments, i am training my brain and body to be with joy, peace, hope, excitement ect… without the fear of them disappearing. that “wallowing” feels heavenly… it all does, actually, even the heavier experiences and sensations, because i am bringing them to consciousness and becoming the witness to my experience.

there’s an intimacy within this practice that i feel is what we are all deeply desiring… an intimacy with self. instead of turning away from our experience, we are turning towards it, witnessing and validating our own internal happenings, our comings and goings, our highs and lows and when we can learn to hold all of us without judgement and allow what is to express itself with full acceptance, we can ultimately find more freedom. and isn’t that really what we are all longing for? 

so, i invite you to try this with me…

set three separate timers on your phone throughout the day. try setting one in the morning, one midday and one in the evening, so you can take a couple of minutes, each time and repeat the exercise above. 

it’s powerful. you’re powerful. acceptance is powerful. 

it is safe to be with what is and i am right there with you, cheering you on and holding you in spirit.

5 comments

  • Wow out of the blue this little bit was in my instagram feed
    It seemed like at this right moment I needed this more than anything in this world . I have had a lot of anxiety lately and went to a Dr to figure out what was going on not realizing the anxiety also was causing panic attacks . I am more centered and I feel better. Then I came across this remembering the book I bought years ago that you wrote that I treasured. So making a story not too long once again our paths cross for a reason I will try this little exercise and report back thank you so much with love and peace , Robin

  • Your practice really reminds me of Eckhart Tolle’s book “The Power of Now”. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. I’m on my 3rd time reading it now. And like you said above, the more you practice every day, the easier it becomes to observe your thoughts and emotions and be in the present moment.

    Best wishes in your healing journey. You will get there. Just give yourself time, grace, patience, and compassion.

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