Happy Stepmom/Bonus Mom day to all the stepmama’s out there! If you’ve followed me long enough, you know it’s an actually thing and something that we honor and celebrate in our family.
To be really honest, I have my challenges as a stepmom… even after a decade. The peace that has opened up within my role as stepmom, I welcome with deep gratitude, but, of course, with all relationships, there are challenges. In sharing that, I’m hoping all the stepmom’s out there feel a little less alone, wherever you are on your journey. You are not alone in your challenges or your joys. Because yes, there are so, so many of those too. I want you to know that you are seen, respected and appreciated… today and everyday.
Stepmom is just a label, one that has sadly come with many negative connotations over centuries. I didn’t even like to use the word several years ago because of the division it implied. In fact, whenever I call myself a stepmom on social media, I am quick to receive comments like “you’re not their stepmom, you’re their bonus mom” or “in our house there is no step.” However, Stepmom is a title that I am proud of, one that I have reclaimed with great honor and respect. It’s a role and a word that has zero division in my heart and therefore, I proudly call myself Mason and Jake’s stepmom. I hope this is a title any stepmom will claim or reclaim for themselves with honor and grace, knowing that in your heart, the heart of your partner… and with time, the heart of the children… and with MORE time, maybe even the heart of your partners ex, there’s truly no division or separation either.
Society… well, our consciousness around this topic, like many other things is still expanding. Give that one A LOT of time.
I also want to take a moment to acknowledge and honor that not all stepmom experiences are alike… just like any parental role, there can be some very heartbreaking stories of abuse and mistreatment. For anyone who has experience this kind of situation, I hear you and I honor your experience.
Ultimately, it’s all about LovE and unity. The family unit is one of the, if not THE greatest teacher in this lifetime and I bow to my teachers. I know a LovE I never expected to know. I know forgiveness and grace. My personal experience has been humbling, heartbreaking at times, but most of all expansive, especially in all matters of the heart. I hope you, stepmom, have the opportunity to know the expansiveness of selfless grace and LovE too. AND, I hope you celebrate the shit out of yourself! I LovE you. ❤️